February Reflections & A Love Story

I realized early this morning that today, February 15th, was my grandmother’s birthday.  Meta Marie Henne was born in Ann Arbor, Michigan, in 1897.  If she were a centennial woman, today would be her 129th birthday; she died at 80 in 1977.  In 1922, a few years after graduating from college a Phi Beta Kappa math major, she married my grandfather, Erich Albert Walter. She was his staunch helpmeet throughout their 55 years of marriage.  In 1972, extended family gathered in Ann Arbor to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary.   

Erich & Meta Walter, 1972

With contributions from all of us, my mother created an elaborate scrapbook stuffed with photos, cartoons, family memories, and plenty of humor.  Appropriately, it was designed as a mock yearbook, since Grandpa spent his entire career at the University of Michigan as professor, dean of students, and then administrator.  I think Grandma complemented his whimsical and outwardly more breezy approach to life with solid good sense and a shared love of reading and education.

She was the soul of patience, or so she seemed to me as a child.  She always had time for her grandchildren, taught us girls how to tat, was glad to cut out paper dolls, and was good at explaining the ways of the world or the requests of our parents in words that we could understand.  Grandma said more than once, that she hoped to grow old with grace. And she did.

She was also an accomplished baker and cook.  We especially liked the little soft rolls she made, her bread and butter pickles, and dishes such as veal in a mild paprika sauce (Paprikafleisch) and Hollander dumplings (a glorified name for beef stuffed cabbage rolls in tomato sauce). Both my grandmothers laid their dining tables with white linen tablecloths and linen napkins; there was an expectation that our manners would live up to the setting.

A woman who wore her black hair in braids curled on her head, she never went completely gray and always wore dresses, stockings, and sensible shoes.  In the 1960’s, during the early fitness craze, she would stand in front of the TV in her dress and follow along with Jack LaLanne doing the exercises.  When visiting, we joined in.  Grandma was also a dedicated gardener.  She was especially fond of her rose bushes, delicate lettuces, and different herbs.  She made a wonderful salad of those greens dressed with a vinaigrette of oil, lemon juice, and fresh lovage from her yard.

We lived 500 miles away in upstate New York and only saw these grandparents once or twice a year.  Fortunately, Grandma and Grandpa were inveterate letter writers.  Hers, in precisely formed penmanship, detailed the state of the garden or the most recent music or theater event at the university.  Grandpa’s letters, written in a bold scrawly manner, were hard to decipher and almost always included a newspaper or magazine clipping about something of note.  Long distance phone calls were expensive and infrequent; when they happened, we four kids had to pass the phone around for a brief greeting after our parents had their chance to talk.

As the eldest grandchild on both sides of the family, I was named for my grandmothers: Jean after my maternal Grandmother Hancock and Marie after Meta.  When the Chief Penguin and I were first married, we enjoyed several summers of attending the Stratford Shakespeare Festival in Ontario with Grandma and Grandpa.  We were their guests, and with two plays a day for several days in a row, we had a surfeit of the bard occasionally leavened by a more contemporary work.  

After seeing Othello one year and finding it too much and definitely not our favorite, Grandpa grabbed my hands, got the four of us in a circle, and had us vow “never to see Othello again.”  Grandma, always more serious on the surface than Grandpa and not wanting to call undue attention to herself, went along with his silliness.  Knowing these grandparents as I did was a treat and a source of fond memories that I treasure still.  Thank you, Grandma, for your love and kindness and your graciousness!

Author Shearer (gb.readly.com)

Fireflies in Winter is a beautiful novel set near Halifax, Nova Scotia, at the end of the 18th century.  Cora is part of a group of Maroons, exiles from Jamaica, who live in a kind of community with former slaves and others.  Fleeing the pressures of that life and an expectation that she would marry a widower, she escapes to the shadowy woods where she connects with Agnes, another young woman.  

Shearer graphically depicts the beauty and the hardships of living in hiding in the woods, particularly during harsh winters.  She delicately reveals the growing trust and developing relationship between Cora and Agnes.  These women are not literate, but they possess depths of feeling and sensitivity to the creatures and the environment around them.  Much of what has marked each woman in her past remains sketchy or unknown; always there are undertones relating to who is free and what freedom really means in daily life.  

I loved the annual appearance of the whales and liked how rounded a character the dog Patience is.  I was also drawn to Thursday and his quiet caring ways.  Some explanatory note about the Maroons, prefacing the novel, would enrich the reading experience for those like me who were unfamiliar with this independent group of Jamaican Blacks.  Recommended for fans of historical fiction and book clubs.  (~JWFarrington)

Note: A version of this review appears in Bookbrowse.com.

Note: Unattributed photos ©JWFarrington (some rights reserved.)

Carolina Moments: Watching, Reading, Eating

In past years, the Chief Penguin and I have made it a goal to see as many of the Best Picture Oscar nominations as possible.  More recently, we’ve been slackers, but we might see a few of them between now and the March awards.

Marty with paddle (wsj.com)

We are fans of Timothée Chalamet since seeing him in Call Me by Your Name and Lady Bird, both films of 2017.  As the star of Marty Supreme, he gave us a good excuse to walk downtown to the cozy Cary theater for an afternoon show.   Chalamet plays Marty Mauser, an overconfident young man out to achieve fame as a star ping pong player, and he was fabulous! He most certainly deserves his nomination for Best Actor.

The film actually has a total of 9 award nominations including Best Picture and Best Director. Did I love the film?  No, not really.  It is fast-paced and intense, with one lively scene after another like a ping pong ball ricocheting back and forth across the game table.  Set in the 1950’s and supposedly inspired by a real ping pong player, it has little in the way of character development or a moral arc.  Perhaps that makes it more realistic.

Marty is perennially supremely confident, arrogant even, ever ready to make a deal and get what he wants with little to no effort.  He’s also careless with other people’s feelings, including his sometime girlfriend’s.  But then, it’s a sports film, and Marty is always hankering after the next major tournament (in Japan, perhaps) and scheming to find the money to get there.  He has no real job and no long-range plans.  

The tournament scenes are dizzying and a technical feat.  The soundtrack is appropriately heavy or boisterous as needed, and Gwyneth Paltrow has a touching role as actress Kay Stone, trying for her own comeback.  I wanted Marty to get his comeuppance and so found the ending disappointing.  Overall, I give it a qualified recommendation as more of a guy’s film.  

Burden (nyt.com)

Author Belle Burden is the product of a socially prominent wealthy family.  Her grandmother was Babe Paley, magazine editor and socialite wife of William, founder and CEO of CBS.  Burden’s mother, Amanda, is an urban planner who was director of city planning in New York under Mayor Bloomberg.  It is not surprising then that Belle, a young lawyer, met and married another rich, preppy lawyer.  He too was socially connected.

Over two decades together, they had three children, and he flourished in his career, while she mostly gave up working, tending to the household and the kids’ lives.  During Covid, she learned James was having an affair.  Confronted, he announced the next day that he wanted a divorce and didn’t want nor care about shared custody of their children.

Strangers is Burden’s account of her shock and disbelief, her struggle to pull herself together, and her probing reflections on why and what motivated husband James to cut himself off so completely.  The book grew out of a column she wrote for Modern Love in the New York Times.  

She is candid in sharing her personal shortcomings, reveals James’ in-it-for- himself approach to money and family, and doesn’t stint on describing how difficult the divorce proceedings were.  Yet she genuinely loved this man and so retains some kindness toward him.  What I found striking was how much she became a 1950’s traditional wife after the arrival of the children, knowing nothing about their family finances and not asking any questions about them.  It’s a very engaging quick read and I recommend it. (~JWFarrington)

Recently, the Chief Penguin and I re-discovered how much we like the Fresh Market stores.  We regularly shopped at our local one in Florida. The Fresh Market in Cary is bigger and nicer with tempting deli salads, a wide variety of ethnic sauces, pickles, and spices, and a cheese case that comes close to rivaling Wegmans. 

Photo on kit package

This time we surrendered to the temptation of one of their Market Meal Kits, specifically the Thai Coconut Chicken Rice Bowl.  There were several choices ranging from flank steak to Korean barbeque, but this one piqued our fancy.  I’ve never prepared one of these meal kits before and was surprised and pleased by the freshness of the ingredients, the sturdy plastic box containing each item separately wrapped, and the straightforward directions.  

Even the olive oil for sautéing was included, along with a small packet of seasoning.  The vegetables, broccoli mostly with some onion, shredded carrots, and a few onion pieces and snap peas, are stir fried and set aside.  While you cook the chicken, the rice packet goes into the microwave for its cooking.  Then add veggies and the coconut sauce to the chicken and voila, in a minute or two you have a complete dish to serve over the rice.  Start to finish without any pauses, it takes just 15 minutes.

The resulting dish was delicious, nicely spiced, and not salty!  We enjoyed it, and not being big eaters, had some leftover for lunch.  We look forward to trying other kits.

Carolina Comments: Cuba & Local Culture

It was not unusual to see images of Fidel Castro around

Seven years ago this week, the Chief Penguin and I were part of a small group educational and cultural trip to Cuba.  We were in Havana the bulk of the time with a trip one day to the Vinales Valley.  In the city, we experienced lunch at a private restaurant, one of the few examples of free enterprise allowed, and heard a talk by an economics professor on how the Cuban economy worked.  We learned about Hispanic music from a musician professor and attended a special dance performance by a lively female troupe.  

Habana Campos Dance with colorful chairs

Havana is called “a city of columns.”  I took a walking tour of the city’s architecture led by a noted local architect and was impressed with the beauty of its historic buildings.  

We also saw a variety of cotton candy convertibles on the streets, sometimes midst buildings in disrepair.  It was a study in contrasts.   

Cotton candy cars, Havana

During our visit, there was a hurricane and the power went off in the middle of our group dinner on the second floor of a partially open-air restaurant.  Undeterred and cooking with gas, the waitstaff brought us our remaining courses by candlelight.  Using our iPhone flashlights, we safely navigated down the stairs to our waiting van.  The hotel and our room were also in the dark until the lights blinked on around 3:00 am.  That was an unexpected adventure.

In the countryside, we visited a tobacco farm, saw tobacco leaves being dried, and could purchase cigars singly or by the box.  At another farm property, we climbed into a wooden cart pulled by a pair of oxen and jogged up a muddy hill for lunch outside.  The family who run this farm were most welcoming and lunch was a tasty spread.

Roast pig for lunch at a family farm

All in all, visiting Cuba was a memorable experience and alas, a trip you couldn’t make today.

Before the latest snowstorm, the Chief Penguin and I enjoyed two outings, one to a concert, the other for lunch at a nearby Lebanese restaurant.

After almost two years in this area, we finally attended a NC Symphony concert in Raleigh.  Meymandi Concert Hall is a contemporary building with 65 ft. high ceilings and several tiers of seating in addition to the main floor orchestra level.  It is named for Dr. Assad Meymandi, a native Iranian, psychiatrist and neurologist, who practiced medicine in Fayetteville and then in Raleigh.  A faithful subscriber to the concerts, he was also a generous donor.  The hall opened in 2001.  

Not being season subscribers, we had a limited choice of seats, but we ended up, happily we discovered, in the 4th row on the main floor.  Very close to the musicians, which might not always matter, but it put us with an excellent view of the pianist Jeneba Kanneh-Mason for her Mozart piano concerto (No.23 in A).  

The concert, led by energetic guest conductor Ketaro Harada, was devoted to Mozart with several pieces in D major, and the concerto in A.  We heard the overtures to “Don Giovanni” and “The Marriage of Figaro” along with Symphony No. 35.  It was a most enjoyable evening and a good incentive to go again.

Due to a civil war in Lebanon in 1976, the Saleh family left their country for the United States.  Unable to find pita bread, they initially started a bakery and then later expanded in 1989 to become a restaurant.  One brother went out on his own and named his new casual restaurant, Sassool, grandmother Cecilia’s nickname.  Today, there are two Sassool locations, one in Cary and one in Raleigh.

A group of us went for lunch and Simone, one of the family owners, offered up a buffet of their signature dishes.  We could sample everything from chicken shawarma, falafel, kibbeh patties, Greek salad, a lentil dish, hummus, baba ghanouj, and, of course, fresh pita bread.  You can eat in or take out from the wide variety of salads and other dishes in their cases or purchase dry goods from the grocery section.  We savored the variety of foods and even brought some of it home!

Note: All photos ©JWFarrington (some rights reserved.)

Carolina Comments: Cocooning in January

Good morning.  Like much of the country, North Carolina is experiencing a winter weather event.  For some, it will be a really massive storm with inches and possibly feet of snow; for others, after a bit of snow, the real concern is freezing rain and ice.  We’ve had just over an inch of snow and are bracing for a wintry mix later today.  If it gets above freezing, we may avoid serious ice and possible power outages.

Taste of winter in North Carolina

Meanwhile, we have nowhere to go and will stay inside cozy and warm.  Yesterday, before the storm arrived, we binge watched two episodes of The Pitt.  Last evening, as a palate (read mind) cleanser, we began Season 6 of All Creatures Great & Small.  Episode 1 is sweet and mostly joyful.  The war is ending, and Tristan returns home on leave.  As for Mrs. Hall, will she be persuaded to come back to Darrowby?  Watch to find out. We also recently viewed the intense crime series, His & Hers, on Netflix.

And there are books, two included here, for your consideration.  I have also started The Loneliness of Sonia and Sonny and made it past the first 100 pages.  It’s a tome and I’m enjoying it.  Look for comments in a future blog.

(Mina.theguardian.com)

The Good Liar is the first book I’ve read by Scottish crime novelist, Denise Mina. It’s a dense and graphic account of the murder of a prominent couple and the events afterward related to investigating the crime.  Claudia O’Sheil is a professor and a blood spatter expert who works for a forensic science company.  Sir Philip Ardmore is her boss and a supportive mentor.  Recently widowed, Claudia is overwhelmed with grief and struggling to deal with her two teenage boys, one unruly and disruptive.

Philip knew the murdered couple and the son, William, is a prime first suspect.  Who besides him had access to the couple’s apartment?  Claudia’s blood evidence results in William being charged and sentenced to prison.  But what if, William wasn’t the murderer?  And what really was the cause of Claudia’s husband James’ death?  If she was wrong about the blood evidence, what is the truth and to whom does she have an obligation to tell?

The novel moves back and forth in time as Claudia’s dilemma about what to say or not is played out against the backdrop of the murder.  There is Philip’s class and place in the power structure and questions about James and their professional colleagues and friends.  

Once I got fully into the book, I was enmeshed in the complexities of the situation.  The writing is precise and detailed and requires close reading.  Recommended for Mina fans. (~JWFarrington)

(bethannfennelly.com)

I reviewed this book for First Impressions pre-publication in BookBrowse and am including my review here.  Publication date is late February 2026.

The Irish Goodbye is a collection of short to extremely brief writings by former poet laureate of Mississippi Beth Ann Fennelly.  It ranges from quick thoughts on married life (a cracked knee when presenting a 25th anniversary ring to folded oven mitts), to contemplating friendships old and fresh, to mourning the sudden death of a sister, to facing the deaths of other family and friends.  Much space is devoted to Fennelly’s recollections of her sister and the deep hole she has left in Fennelly’s life.  Mixed with the sadness and the wondering, there is also humor and wit. 

I found this book a delight.  As it progresses, Fennelly removes a few more layers and candidly exposes more of herself.  Her prose is succinct and precise and often sparkles. She makes you smile as you admire her adept turn of phrase.  Recommended for book clubs looking for a short powerful punch!  (~JWFarrington)

Jack & Anna (rotten tomatoes.com)

His & Hers is a six-part mystery series set in a suburb of Atlanta. Jack Harper is a county detective and his estranged wife Anna is a TV reporter who returns after having been away for a year. The death of her friend Rachel brings her back. She and Jack tangle over how the murder is covered and who is involved. At the heart of the series is set of girls who were high school classmates, some friends, some not.

The series is intense, emotions run high, there is plenty of sex, and lots of F-bombs. We thought about abandoning it after the initial episode, but somehow got sucked in and were caught up short by the ending. Overall, it’s a clever story of lies and facades, and you are kept guessing as to whose truth is the truth.